"Why do you do this to yourself??"

Every time I come in from a run and look like death, Steve looks at me and says "Why do you do that to yourself?" HA! Some days, I tell him because it feels great, other days I want to tell him "I have NO IDEA!" Because that is the truth. So today after my run, 2.5 miles with some off roading, and hill training in the 80 degree weather, I sat down on the couch and thought "Seriously, WHY?"

I am on an AMAZING group on Facebook for my local running mamas and these women are so inspiring and most of them have a true love for running. It is what pushes me, what keeps me going. I am not one of those sickos that loves running. The 1st mile is ALWAYS the hardest. I spend my first 12 minutes, literally talking myself into sticking with it. For 12 minutes, the voice in my head screams for me to stop!! It tells me I am not a runner, who am I fooling?? It tells me I am too slow. That people are judging me. That little evil voice tells me to stop, that I will never get faster. It says "face it, Amber, you are just not a runner."

And for those first 12 minutes, I believe every stupid word. I turn up my music in hopes of drowning it out. I press on and focus on my breathing. Then the first mile passes and I think,  well if I can do a mile, I can certainly do another. And I press on. Then my legs tell me that I need to walk, and my lungs beg me to stop. And sometimes I give in and walk a few strides before I am ashamed of myself for walking, so I pick up the pace.

For many, running is therapeutic. It is their quiet time. Quiet time? My inner voice never shuts the hell up. I run miles on end with nothing but self doubt. My body is beyond capable. When will my mind catch up?? When will I stop doubting myself so much?

As I sat here today, I read a thread from my Run, Mama, Run group where all of the women told their "Why I started running" story. So I sat down and wrote mine. You remember the fat girl running story. The LOWEST point of my running career, by far.

It made me realize, that maybe I don't love running. But, I am not "that girl" anymore. I may not look like a runner in my day to day clothes. But when I lace up those running shoes, I am a runner. I am slow and I slouch too much, and I may look like I am dying for my entire run, but I am a runner. I may be full of self doubt and I may want to quit. But I don't. It is with that determination that I plan to complete a 10 mile training run this Sunday.

Why does someone who doesn't love to run, plan to run 10 miles, then a half marathon in 5 weeks? The answer is simple. I may not feel like a runner during mile 1 or even mile 2. I may not feel like a runner when I walk because my legs won't carry me anymore. But I DO feel like a runner when I cross that damn finish line. And one day I will love it...right? :)

Oh and if you are still following me and wanting to know how my weight loss journey is going, HELLOOOO 170's!!!!!! I am 177.9. My original goal was 155, but I am finally getting comfortable in my own skin and am reassessing my goal. I think 160 will make me happy!!

Stay tuned!

What makes me tick?

HOLY HELL!!! Has it really been 2 months since I last blogged?? Well then, expect a weight loss blog VERY SOON:) Because I am still getting skinny:)

BUT this week is something else entirely. 3 years ago today I bought my starter kit with Slumber Parties. A LOT has happened in the past 3 years. I have SO much to be grateful for. THIS blog is about that. About the switch that shocked many and about MY reasons.

 I signed up with Slumber Parties with the intention of simply making extra $$. I did that, and my business TOOK OFF! I was making more working a couple of parties a week than I was working full time. So I soon quit my job and decided to make a go of SP full time. I was thrilled. I worked hard, was building a great team and making money. Everything I wanted:) In 2009, I sold just under $56k in retail and signed 12 girls. That made me #1 New Consultant company wide and I landed my place on the Slumber Parties VIP Advisory Board. I was in AWE! My spot on the Advisory Board earned me a FREE trip to Mexico. I met a lot of amazing women on that trip. 2 days before that trip, I found out I was pregnant. THAT was the most AMAZING thing that happened to me that year. :)

I got the feeling from several women that being pregnant that year would hinder my goals. All that meant is they didn't know me ;) I found out I was pregnant on May 12 2010. In 2010, I signed 16 women and did just under $96,000 in sales. I was #12 in the company that year. I won the 4th quarter contest (my 3rd trimester) and won a cruise to the Eastern Caribbean. I upgraded that trip so I could take my family of 4. What an amazing reward for all of my hard work. My little guy was 9 months old when he traveled internationally :)

I had Jayce on January 18, 2011. I backed off to doing just enough parties to pay my bills. Still clearing $50k in sales in 2011. The reason I work is hard as I do is for that little boy <3 I work HARD and Jayce and I play HARDER! I am meant to be a stay at home mommy. I am meant to make sure that my son does without nothing!!! That he sees the world and that first and foremost he KNOWS mommy will never miss anything in his life that is so important. I make my own schedule, I work for myself. THAT is what drives me.

So late in 2011, an opportunity to switch to Pure Romance presented itself. My first thought was NO WAY! I love Slumber Parties, despite the fact I had my ups and downs with the company. Downs that I do not discuss. If you are reading this in hopes of me putting down SP, you won't see that here. Just know that not everyone shares the things that were done to them in that company. Many people will never have to see the negative, and for that I am grateful. Just know that every company has its negative qualities. There are NO exclusions. I had resigned myself to the fact that every company has its negatives. PERIOD. Therefore anything negative that ever happened to me had NO impact on my decision to switch companies.

The opportunity that arose was one that involved me getting a pay raise. But NOT just me. MY TEAM would see a HUGE pay raise. Do you know how HUGE that is to my team??? I switched knowing that my teams best interest was at heart. I truly thought about this decision HARD. I didn't want to let my clients down. I didn't know if they were loyal to me or to Slumber Parties. I confided in a few of my loyal clients to get their input. Like me, when they saw the product line, they were sold. I looked into Pure Romance KNOWING that I would be able to offer my clients more scents, flavors, bedroom accessories, a face care/beauty line and nicer packaging. I saw quickly that I was switching to a company that focused on women's health and the health of women who have been through chemo. A company that offers TRUE sexual health certification. AMAZING!

Upon switching, I had to discuss this with my team. I needed them to know that I wanted all of them to come with me. I wanted them to make more $. To truly succeed. Many of them came with me. Only a handful stayed. Even then some of those trickled my way. This switch was MUCH bigger than that. Women who were never on a team in SP contacted me. Women who felt like a number on a big team contacted me. Women who had been wronged contacted me. Before I knew it, my team of 20 had multiplied. I also found that women who had wanted to sign up were sold when they saw the change in products and professionalism.Our team is now 100+ strong. In less than 3 mos, I hit the highest level in Pure Romance. My overrides checks in a month are more than my husband bring in in a MONTH! Because of this, I can actually work less. Which means more time with my family, more time with my baby boy <3

Unfortunately, my switch also brought on a lot of negativity. I received a lot of backlash from former colleagues,  from former "friends." I was called out on my disloyalty. Told I should be thankful for everything SP GAVE me. GAVE ME? GAVE ME???? I worked hard for everything I EARNED!!! I am not saying I didn't earn amazing things, but I EARNED THEM!!! I busted my butt for EVERYTHING I EARNED!!!! Let's be clear, NOTHING was handed to me, nor would I have expected it to be. I was told I would fail, by people who clearly don't know me. I was shunned by some. Never in my life have I been treated that way. NEVER. Never in my life with all of my job switches did previous employers or coworkers treat me with such anger. With such disrespect. My feelings got hurt...still hurt if you can't tell. What do I say to those people? Nothing. I have removed the negativity. I remind myself that it is onward and upward. Every night I lay my head on my pillow and I sleep like a baby. I go to sleep KNOWING that my family is better off because I was brave enough to step out of my comfort zone. I was brave enough to make a change for my family. I was brave enough to face the negativity with grace. I am brave enough to continue my journey. This decision was not personal, it was business.

My heart and soul is in the romance industry. I LOVE empowering women, in strengthening relationships, in helping women discover themselves. I love helping my incredible team achieve their dreams. I LOVE my life. I LOVE what I do. I LOVE Pure Romance and the opportunity that arose. I LOVE the 4 amazing women who paved the way to help me every step of the way. The 4 women who welcomed me into their circle to help lead our team to the very top<3. I love the team of amazing women I am on. Women I see every day raising the bar on their goals. The women I see EVERY DAY achieving their dreams! This is the path I was meant to be on. The life I am meant to lead.

I appreciate you taking the time to read this blog. If you have chosen to stand by me, I appreciate that more than you know <3 I truly hope that this blog helps you understand me a little better. Love or hate me, I am me. I am a women who loves my family more than anything in the world. I am a mommy who works hard at being a great mommy to my son. A wife that could be better at housework, but I try:) A daughter who loves my parents and am grateful for having their amazing support. I am a sister who loves my siblings fiercely and will defend them until the day I die. I am FIERCELY loyal! I am loyal to my family, I am loyal to my friends, and I am loyal to MYSELF.

Until next time!

My "why" :)

My how the time flies!

2011 was quite a year! On New Year's Eve last year, I was sitting at home, eating an ENTIRE fresh pineapple in hopes of putting myself into labor! LOL! Yeah, well that didn't work!

On January 18, 2011, my lifelong dream of becoming a mommy finally came true. Most of this year has been spent thoroughly enjoying every waking minute with this AMAZING little human that I created:):) Being a mommy has been everything I wanted and more!! It is fun, fascinating and at times, COMPLETELY frustrating:) BUT it is by far the hardest job I have ever loved.

Just a few short months, we welcomed my newest nephew, Gavon into the world:) That involved Taryn and I learning the breastfeeding ropes together, it was nice to have someone so close to understand the struggle!!! If you have never breastfed, then you will never truly understand the struggle that is involved.

As the year continued, most things that occurred that did not involve Jayce, are merely a blur. It's funny how motherhood can do that to a person. You almost lose a part of yourself, willingly handing it over to that tiny little person...no questions asked.

So I am sure that I did something great from March-October, but for the life of me, I don't know what those things were!! But I do know that in November, we headed out on a free cruise to the Eastern Caribbean. It was a cruise I earned for my family of 4. It was an amazing thing to go on a cruise knowing that my hard work paid off. And what an accomplishment to know that not only am I able to provide for my family, but I am also able to have my little guy travel internationally before he turns a year old!!! How amazing!!!

Then my entire world shifted on November 12 when we learned of my Pap's stroke. As he deteriorated before my eyes, I knew that this time was it. And on November 15, I said goodbye to one of the strongest and most influential men I knew. And everyday I am grateful for the lifetime of memories I have of him. And I am more grateful that even though Jayce won't remember his great grandfather, I know that Pap had 9 months of memories with Jayce.

In the midst of the loss, a lot of other changes occurred. The biggest on being my switch from Slumber Parties to Pure Romance. Within this transition, I learned who my true friends were. This was a change that I thought long and hard about. It was not an easy decision. It was a decision I made in the best interest of MY family. It was nothing personal. People who knew me, knew that I had a passion for Slumber Parties and the job I did. I am grateful for everything I was able to accomplish with Slumber Parties. But an offer I couldn't refuse was put in front of me. As it turns out, it was not a passion for the company that I had. The passion I have is for my job, for my clients, and for my family. With Pure Romance I have been even more successful in every aspect. I can better take care of my family, the products allow for me to help my clients more than ever and my passion for the job has only multiplied:)

As the year comes to an end, there have been ups and downs, but I can say with honesty that it has been an amazing year. And I am blessed:)

As for a resolution, there are so many things!!! I want to continue to grow as a person, as a wife, as a mommy, as a business owner. A huge part of that will involve continuing on my weight loss journey. I have a goal to reach my ideal size by Easter. That is 25 more pounds or a size 8!! I am a firm believer that you can't just have a resolution, YOU MUST HAVE A PLAN!!!! So currently I am embarking on my Turbo Fire journey. The plan is a 12week one that I will most likely extend to 20 weeks. I start that tomorrow. I will be pairing it with the "Fuel the Fire" eating plan which goes along with Turbo Fire.

Not only do I have a plan of action, but I will be kicking of 2012 with a 10k!!! Here is to another great year!!!!



***Updated measurements AFTER the 5 day Inferno plan******

Here are my starting stats:                                             As of 12/31/11

Weight: 189.2                                                                            Weight: 188.1
Waist: 41.5"                                                                               Waist: 39"
Hips: 45"                                                                                    Hips: 44"
Chest: 43"                                                                                  Chest: 42"
Right Arm: 13"                                                                          Right Arm: 12.5"
Left Arm: 13"                                                                            Left Arm: 12.5"
Right Thigh: 25"                                                                       Right Thigh: 24.5"
Left Thigh: 24.5"                                                                       Left Thigh: 24"

That is 1.1 pounds gone and even better than that, 6.5 INCHES GONE:) :)

Until next time!

Turbo Fire Inferno Day 2

Well, today was tougher than yesterday...I woke up and had very on plan meals/snacks:

Breakfast: Yogurt and Wheat Toast

Snack: Celery and PB
 
Lunch: Whole wheat wrap with grilled chicken, lettuce and free zesty italian

After dinner snack: Shakeology made with a half a banana

Worked my tail off doing the workout: Fire45 and HIIT 20. The #'s indicate the length of the workout. HIIT is high intensity interval workouts...aka ASS KICKING!!! LOL!!! I sweat buckets and burned over 700 calories.

That is where my "good day" ends...I was slammed with a full blow migraine and found myself on the couch for the rest of the night :( So I didn't cook up the chicken tacos that are on the plan. Instead, Steve picked me up a side salad and chicken noodle soup from Chick-Fil-A. So even though I wasn't 100% on plan today, I am happy with my decisions:) And know I still burned enough calories to help with my weight loss:)

Tomorrow has a HUGE agenda!!! Busy work around the house, then attacking Fire55EZ Class. Then I will be meeting up with my sister for a "long run" of at least 4 miles, maybe 5! Just depends on how crazy we are feeling:)

I will be sticking to the food plan tomorrow all the way through the snacks. Then I am Baltimore bound!!! My sister and her boyfriend bought my husband and I tickets to see Jeff Dunham:) YAY!!!! So I will be eating dinner on the road. I plan to stick to a healthy salad or something along those lines!

If I don't check in tomorrow, I will catch up on Thursday:)

Turbo Fire Inferno Plan!!!

Well, I survived day 1 of the TF 5 Day Inferno Plan! The Inferno Plan is a plan you can do before the 90 day workout program. It is designed to help jump start your weight loss.

The plan is very specific about your diet and your workout plan for 5 days. It is low calorie and tough workouts. I decided I CAN do this! It is only 5 days after all. Today wasn't easy. I have been hungry, but my body will adjust within the next day or two.

Today's meal plan included:

Breakfast: 1 scrambled egg and 1 slice of turkey turkey bacon on 2 slices of wheat toast

Snack: 1/2 of a medium banana and 7 walnut halves

Lunch: Salad topped with tuna and FF Italian dressing

Snack: Shakeology made with almond butter and water

Dinner: Honey Dijon Chicken and broccoli

My workout was Fire55ez and Stretch 10.  Not only is it specific when it comes to workouts and meals, but I also can only drink water and 1 glass of tea or coffee a day (only stevia can be used to sweeten) so needless to say I have only had water today.

I am proud of myself for sticking to it so far. It isn't easy, but I am hoping I will get at least a 3 pound loss to get me rolling as I start the 90 day challenge:)

BEFORE Turbo Fire Stats! And a potato soup recipe:)

So, I am ANXIOUSLY awaiting the arrival of my Turbo Fire DVD's to get here, waiting is SO NOT my strong suit. In the meantime, I have been obsessed with before and after photos from the program, they are AMAZING!!! And so, you have seen my "before" picture from the day after I delivered my son. If you forgot here it is:

Yep, that is me at 255 pounds! Yikes!!! Now here is my most recent "during" picture:

That is me at 189. Now I should warn you that the clothes hide WAY more than you think. These next pictures are me in my yoga pants and sports bra. I am 189. I am not taking or posting them because I am proud of it. I know 70 pounds is a lot to lose and I am proud, but I am not proud of the way my body looks. I have very little muscle tone, and more skin than I would like. BUT, I know many of you are still struggling with your weight loss, and I want to be real with all of you...I am sick to my stomach just *thinking* about posting these but here you go:

TURBO FIRE STARTS TOMORROW!!!!! :)
Here are my starting stats:

Weight: 189.2
Waist: 41.5"
Hips: 45"
Chest: 43"
Right Arm: 13"
Left Arm: 13"
Right Thigh: 25"
Left Thigh: 24.5"

***Photos and stats will be updated in 30 days***




Loaded Baked Potato Chowder (adapted from Pamper Chef)

(I use a deep covered baker for this recipe)

• 3 large baking potatoes  (about 2 1/2 pounds)
• 3 1/2 cups milk , divided
• 4 ounces cream cheese, softened(I use 1/3 fat and 8 oz)
• 2 tablespoons butter
• 2 -3 green onion (with tops)
• 4 ounces shredded cheddar cheese
• 1 1/2 teaspoons salt
• 1/2 teaspoons black pepper coarsely ground
•   bacon, chopped and cooked(I use the REAL bacon bits)
• sour cream

Directions:

1. Slice potatoes in half lengthwise
2. Place in Deep Covered Baker.
3. Pour 1/2 cup of the milk over the potatoes.
4. Microwave, covered on high for 11 minutes. Remove baker from microwave.
5. Move center potatoes to ends of baker and outer potatoes to center.
6. Cover and microwave on high 8 to 11 minutes or until potatoes are easily pierced with a fork.
7. Remove baker from microwave and coarsely mash potatoes with Mix 'N Chop.
8. Meanwhile, whisk cream cheese until smooth in Classic Batter Bowl.
9. Slowly add remaining 3 cups milk, whisking until smooth.
10. Add cream cheese mixture and butter to baker.
11. Microwave, covered, on high 3 to 5 minutes or until mixture is hot.
12. Slice green onions with Chef's Knife.
13. Carefully remove baker from microwave
14. Add green onions, salt, and black pepper and mix using Small Mix 'N Scraper until cheese is melted.( I personally top each bowl with these ingredients)
15. Serve with bacon and sour cream if desired.
     
    I serve with chunks of a good, crusty bread to dip in it:)

A Plateau?!?!?! Whaaaattttt?!?!!?

Hey Everyone!

It has been a few weeks. I had a hard time with the weeks following the loss of my pap. But I am back to it! Despite our loss, my life has been pretty amazing!! I recently left Slumber Parties and took a better position at Pure Romance...the grass may not always be greener, but I assure you, this time is has been AMAZING! I have never been happier with my job before. That happiness has carried over into every aspect of my life:) I am beyond grateful for the blessings!

Now, what you have all been waiting for...how has my weight loss journey been going? Hmmmmm.....can you say PLATEAU?!?!?! Yep it happens to everyone. Apparently, after 70 pounds, my body has decided that it wants to halt. Does that mean I give up??? HA!!!! You know me better than that, right?? :)

So it is time to switch things up! I am still tracking on my fitness pal. (amberd0626) And I just ordered Turbo Fire! It is a 6 day a week exercise program that is 12 weeks long. I did a TON of research on this program and I can just tell it is EXACTLY what I need to blast these last 30 pounds! I will be posting results weekly once I get started with the program. Not only will I check in weekly (I promise this time!) but I will be posting monthly photos and measurements. My measurements may not be pretty, nor will my photos, but they keep me honest and to let you know that we are all "real people" and if I can do this, so can YOU!

I considered mot posting about my plateau. There is nothing more discouraging than busting your ASS and not seeing the damn scale make a move. But the fact is, nearly everyone at some point or another in their weight loss journey hits a plateau. It's a necessary evil. One that can make or break you weight loss journey! It is important that when the scale stops moving, you realize that it is just the way your body responds to weight loss. That is why it is also important that you track your measurements, because sometimes the scale is not moving, but you ARE getting skinnier:)

So this week, I CHALLENGE you to take measurements and if you haven't taken pictures to document your changing body, then NOW is the time!!! I would love for you to share your progress with me! Let's motivate each other!

Until next time here are my latest pics! 30 pounds until GOAL!